The Cat Pea University Commencement Address
The Cat Pea University Commencement Address

Saturday • January 2nd 2021 • 6:44:22 pm

The Cat Pea University Commencement Address

Saturday • January 2nd 2021 • 6:44:22 pm

Dear Parents,

School past elementary may not be working,

you should let your children know it is broken.

Tell them, it is still a big deal for you,

because as babysitters go, school is the best.

But be warned, if your child is getting bad grades,

then that means the school has picked you child for a stupid little sacrifice.


Let me explain why this is happening,

if school really was a babysitter...

Then your children would be safe,

but it is an institution under pressure to show results or lose accreditation.

If your child stops memorizing and starts messing with their statistics,

they will be seen as a problem, an anomaly.

They many become part of the small percentage of failures,

or they may be tagged with Attention Deficit, or a Bipolar Disorder, where they will be given dangerous, by incompetent doctors, to encourage memorization.

To use Sir Ken Robinson's example,

they will be given dangerous drugs, the way people used to have their tonsils removed.


Scientists make mistakes, corporations make money,

we cannot rule our a fictitious epidemic, the world is too complex to get clear answers.

Sir Ken Robinson was too wise,

too loving, too experienced for us to ignore his work.


All we need to do, is ask,

are we OK with schools being little more than good babysitters?

Do we want the students to become great beings,

or great employees?

And we need to ask,

if the schools had worked for us.


And if the answer is that schools are not working,

then let us become more authentic on this subject.

Let us stop celebrating fake graduations,

let us stop caring about fake grades and worthless diplomas.

And let us all understand that a school education,

is a fake education, a failed education, the absolute minimum that does almost nothing.


Everything around your child will conspire

to make them think that their grade point average, is a measure of their intelligence.

The grades given out by teachers that tweak their tests to stay under the radar and keep their job,

are only representative of the teacher's fraud, and the fraudulent nature of the school it self.

If your child has tricked themselves into thinking they are not smart,

then that means school isn't the only thing that is failing them.


If they ever mentioned a bully,

let them know right now, that they can listen to audio books, and don't need to go back to school anymore.

Help them find SAT tutors that can explain everything,

and not just expect them to memorize garbage.

Genius, is nothing more than a matter of practice of knowledge,

the way athletes practice their sports, and magicians practice their tricks.

Do not let your children think that they are not intelligent,

or that there is something wrong with them because they can't brainlessly memorize disconnected facts.

Let them learn for real,

help them become Entrepreneurs and a Founders.

The school industry is an outdated industry, it stands today as a monument to greed,

and only because too many people rely on it for a small paycheck.

Above all know this; there is no greater crime in the universe,

then a parent standing idly by as their child is slowly convinced they are not smart enough, to become a Great Being.


Dear Students,

This very moment in time, right now,

marks the beginning of your self education.

You are to take to nature trails,

learn to hike and backpack.

Slowly build up your strength,

to cross the world's longest trails.

You will carry your dorm room

on your back, in a back pack.

Be safe,

do not push yourself too hard.

The school library are all the Audio Books,

that move you, listen to each one many times over.

May the nature, and the starts, and the trail,

help you inherit all the world's wisdom.

You are to fill yourself with knowledge,

until you become wise.

And you will know the day of your graduation

out of your own hard earned wisdom.

May you carry on forward,

to become a Great Being and Great Inspiration.

May you become a bringer of Trail Magic,

and above all, Festina Lente.